Lines to circles

Mia wrote:

I believe visual tools like maps are important to understand where we are and where, by choice, we want to go. Instead of using a linear, up and down model with different levels I would like to suggest the use of a circle with different stages in the horse/human relationship.

I looked at the examples she gave links to and I think they're quite interesting. I think some others suggested looking at it more in these terms too. I wonder if we could revise the chart in terms of circles. Anyone want to try?

Today Patrik didn't want to miss out on any potential treats so he made his way right up to me when I came in the pasture. After a brief nosing revealed that I didn't have any, he walked over to the pump house and very carefully backed up to its low eave and pushed his hindquarters against it which made him round through his loins. It looked like he was giving himself a back adjustment. I wish I'd had enough presence of mind to take a picture. When I visit him at night sometimes he backs up to me and has me perform this "adjustment" as well.

After the rain yesterday and scattered showers today, much of the pasture was looking more like a pond than ground. There were 3 Canadian geese who had taken up residence for the day. They honked very loudly as I made my way through.

This ghost-like blooming tree was a beautiful sight.

The following video clip is taken from under the old apple tree that we've already met. There was a robin who seemed to be either scolding me for being there, or warning the rest of the woods that there was an intruder under the apple tree. Maybe both.

Some things are simply eye-catching to me, like this stump with fungi and moss...

this leaf...

the mystery plants...

and another leaf with diamond drops on it...

The clouds were a stunning canvas of white and gray over blue. I went to town today (Grass Valley) after about two weeks stuck at home between being sick and my back being out. It was nice to visit the human forest too. I saw a movie and talked to some people I hadn't met before. I think my life right now has a good balance between the very natural area where I and the horses live with the community we're part of, and the "rest of the world" which is where we all came from.

The more time I spend in this community on the Ridge and in nature, taking walks, being quiet, reading books, playing and singing music with friends and such, the more I appreciate what a unique circumstance I've become a part of. I don't know where it's heading but it feels like there's nowhere else on earth I'd rather be.

As I was heading back to the Ridge I got a call from JD that he needed me to put Sofi in for the night. Apparently she was asserting her independence and JD hasn't gotten the hang of how to sweet talk her in. Sofi has shown her scary side to JD and Tricia (Tricia is a woman who also works with me and the horses sometimes) and so far I haven't been successful in teaching them how to get past that and into her sweetness.

It took me quite a while before I figured out how to do it myself. Intellectually I had known that Sofi's anger/scariness was a reflection of something in me but it wasn't until I "slowed down" enough that I was actually able to see it happening as if in slow motion and I was able to truly see and feel it rather than intellectually think about what must be going on.

I hope to get it on video sometime, to show the difference between being able to shift and walk into Sofi and bring out her sweetness or scariness. I'll try and describe it here. I walk towards her (or she walks towards me) and we both start out relaxed, and then there is a very brief moment when she might flip her ears back and I react energetically by getting scared that this is going to be a repeat of past times when she has come after me. I believe her ear flip is her question of "Are you going to hurt or scare me?" and if I respond in fear or anger, then the attack will almost certainly come (although her "attacks" are pretty mild these days). If I am able to answer her ear flip question with a relaxation, and stepping in to offer her a scratch, she will almost always immediately soften and gratefully receive the scratching. So, between her and I, we pretty much have it worked out now that I can energetically control my approach/response and we have a nice connection.

The trick is how to teach this to someone else who may not be able to catch that moment and hold themselves in a positive place. The moment they doubt, it's all over, and then both that person and Sofi has become ingrained even more deeply the old pattern. In a way I think this is a microcosm for all the "bad behavior" that happens between horses and humans.

When Klaus Ferdinand Hempfling works with horses, he always takes the horse away from his owner and works with the horse himself or has a different person work with the horse for at least the first day or two. This way he is able to immediately break any ingrained habits by being a human who does completely different things than any other human has ever done with the horse. The horse, in response, "wakes up" and starts to be curious about what's happening rather than going further within himself as would happen if the owner were to continue working with him, even if the owner was being directed to do things differently.

It is an extremely subtle dance to watch and I'm grateful to have horses as willing to express themselves as Sofi and Sundance have been. If it weren't for them I would never have found this path in the first place. I remember in the movie Avatar when they're talking about which dragon becomes yours to ride. The answer is, the one who fights with you. I may be misremembering the actual words and perhaps fight isn't the best word anyway. I would say, the one who challenges you the most.

I believe it is that way with people too. The ones who challenge us the most are the ones we can learn the most from. And within ourselves, the things that give us the greatest internal challenges are those things that in the end will be the source of our greatest gifts and harmony if we can find that very small, narrow yet bright path that feels like home.

As I was writing this post I just saw the comment from Valezka in response to yesterday's post come through. Thank you Valezka for writing about your own path. I know it will resonate with many here.